Why, hello!

Hey! You're the first one here. It's so nice to see you, come right in, but- but take those muddy shoes off, first. I don't mean to impose, it's just- well- we just got this rug cleaned, it cost a fortune. We had no idea it would come to so much. We went to this guy we see in these cheesy commercials during Caps games- Hadeed! You've seen them, too? Oh my God- that's crazy. You realize afterward- How does a rug cleaner afford to buy ad space during the Caps game? You realize it right around when the bill comes.

But anyway- sit down, please. We've got some cheese crackers, and slices of sausage, and I just got these chips in the mail- Hartley's, you ever heard of them? They only sell them around the little towns I grew up in, and I'd just die without them.

Oh, and did you read the story? You know, we were reading K.M. Hirosaki's "Sanguine & Clockwork." Don't be self-conscious if you didn't- you have plenty of time to page through it, and even if you only want to listen, no one's gonna press you. Just enjoy yourself. It's a great story, though, the fantasy stuff always gets me, and I just loved when that undead fox, Vico- I won't bug you with it just yet, you should be getting comfortable.

You must know Skip and the work he's done editing for Bad Dog Books, since I don't think we've met. I'm Toonces. I'm a writer, and I have no trouble considering myself a writer because only a true talent could be so unaccomplished. Skip's still getting a few things ready in the back. In fact, I'm going to go back and help. There's still so much to do! Don't be afraid to introduce yourself if anyone comes, and if you don't have a copy of  "Sanguine and Clockwork," you can have one of ours. Don't thank us, it's a great story but we've got plenty, we want to give them away.

Oh, and one last thing- yes- yes, you can just hand it over right here. That's a nice bottle of wine. So glad you didn't forget.

Anyway, make yourself right at home. Our house is your house. And thanks for coming to the first meeting of our book club!